From a relatively old soul in the art on cyber-socializing (14 years and counting) I guess I’ve experience enough of everything. From addictive online gaming and chatting to complicated friendships and scandals (not the likes of Hayden Kho & Katrina, okay? not in my wildest imagination) to real life emotional trauma & what not.

And from those experiences, no…I don’t have any dirty little secrets to confess.

I both agree and disagree to the article written. I agree because its true, the Internet has gone from informative (until now it is, in fairness) to more destructive (in such a way, of course – I shouldn’t be generalizing). It has been an avenue for diverse crimes (lawfully and morally) and a reason for more (not so) socially accepted (self-coined) “internet relationship.” I cannot speak for my friends but as for me, I haven’t been into one. I don’t want to. I still think that personal courtship is evitable to every relationship. For those who engage (or currently engaged in one) I don’t criticize them, but let me share one thing: guard your feelings. That’s why there’s a disclaimer in every chat room you enter into ‘cause no one is indispensable in emotional kaleidoscope.

“This is now a reality. Everyone goes with the trend” -- so false!

I disagree mainly because, not all those who are into chatting fall for the web-trap of lies, deceit and hot love affairs. Not everybody who has been in a relationship has ended up broken and hurt. I can name a few successful relationships. Not everyone betrothed in cyber socializing is committing infidelity or has malicious intent to his/her chat buddies.

Here’s the moral: in every situation whether be it chat or text. One must be on the guard of his/her feelings. If it’s inevitable to separate your real personality to your pseudo personality well, think again, you may not want to risk your so-called vulnerability. If you think you cannot play the game, don’t even try to start. If you think it doesn’t fit you at all – do not get yourself into it. Don’t blame it on the technology. It’s not the systems fault. It’s the people who use and abuse it that should be blamed.

I don’t know if I even made sense, lol

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about friends and foes and what it means to me to have so many internet relationships. I’m into conscious living, personal development and self improvement. I’m striving to become more forthright and effective in my communications and to become a better listener too.

Online friendships can be very real and very valuable, and when compared to face -to-face friendships they have different strong and weak points.

One way in which increased communication on the internet is beneficial is that it allows people like me who are less personable and outgoing, to feel less inhibited to communicate. Although there are benefits, there are also some disadvantages of an internet based society as well, such as the ability to fantasize and create enemies and conflict where none ought to exist.

In cyber relationships, we have only words. We lack the visuals including body language, facial expressions and gestures that we strongly rely on on face-to-face relationships. We also lack sound and the ability to touch others we come into contact with. In face-to-face meetings this sensory feedback is critically important data that gives us confidence in another person, and allows us to create a foundation of trust upon which communication and friendship are based.

On one hand, when people can’t be seen or identified, some can be more willing to open up and share true feelings. On the other, some cannot truly emotionally express themselves over the internet, which is one of the argued disadvantages of communication on the internet. When there is a personal, face- to- face relationship and possibly unequal status, people have something to lose by sharing their feelings. In face-to-face relationships, there is a level of vulnerability. The person receiving the information is more likely to pass judgment and the person giving the information is more likely to get hurt.

In the absence of sensory input online we can believe we know someone well when we really don’t actually know them at all. How this happens is easily explained; we tend to create the missing data with our imagination. Yes, we fantasize and we can easily make huge mistakes.

When we communicate with others online we judge them to be “friend” or “foe” not only based on private information and opinions they share, but also on the fantasies about them that we create between our ears.

We want to connect with others in the cyber world and just as we can meet those whom we either like or dislike in person, we can also meet those we think we like or dislike online. However, it’s important to recognize that we all tend to project only portions of our personalities online, and as we lack sensory input, we can do each other a disservice by engaging in fantasies.

-kikong matsing-

Someone once said that all of us has the tendency to hide and one way is using the internet but before that it was pagers and text messages although is has gotten a lot wilder this time, we still cannot blame technology for this.Maybe it did get a lot easier but take note it is still the person using it...a question of Am i willing to be part of that trend or not?


Instead of focusing on the other effect of the internet why not try to see it in a different way.It's true that the internet has brought us closer together (i mean in general) but even without this techonology most of us we'll always be the same and for a fact most people do lie even without techonlogy.

Most cyber people are there for a reason and a majority of that is the cyber world offers us things we don't usually do in reality, either they lack the confidence to socialize of escape reality in which we all know that we really are living in a harsh world where sometimes people do tend to belittle each other,by the way we act or look.

The Internet is a tool in which we all use from searching information to meeting other people and like I said it's not the technology but the people using it.

As for relationship goes it's not about the internet but the people involve, As you can see, trust and love is still the foundation of a true relationship, how far will you go if you do meet that special someone.

like all relationships it involves risks, whether you met them on the streets or in a chatroom.It has always been that way and it will never change just because another technology is introduced.

All relationships are still based on love and trust.

Hindi ko maintindihan ano gusto mo sabihin...hehe

tungkol d2 : "Is there any dirty wireless little secrets you have kept for the past years?"

you mean? cyber sex? or sop? sot?

answer: wala e, i dont beleive having cyber sex, sop? sot? soc? can fulfill your sexual desires..

i answer ur question clearly,

Being physically alone inside a room, your mind filled with primal passion allows you to connect with a lot of restless souls with the help of the computer. When you begin riding in cyberspace, impressions about your personality dispelled & will turn you into a Casanova. CS,EB,SEB,CTC,ASL etc. are chat abbreviations used on a chatroom and take the role of a hook up location. Unfortunately, chatrooms are a potential stalking ground for relationship seeking gone awry. It is difficult to read body language, eye lingo & verbal pacing of sentences via email. One of the ways people can keep themselves safe in inet/dating relationships is to feel and respond to their RED flags. People have created false sentences of intimacy via web. A false sense of relationship intimacy increases rapid personal disclosure, whether that person is safe or not. While it is unlikely that i-net relationship seeking will ever disappear, we need to understand the risks of inet hook-ups and the way it puts mostly woman at a distinct disadvantage.

Whether as friends, lovers or whatsoever, those people who respect the power of words & feelings of other human beings benefit a lot from it. On the other hand, it can be a dangerous tool in the hands of frustrated, angry and bitter people. Always be optimistic that as we become more experienced inet users, we would be able to increase its usefulness and decrease its abuse.

Im not in authority to say whether this relationship via inet is good or not. What I would like to impart is, we must be responsible for all our actions. Learn to control your emotions. I know its difficult but we must master that art guys. I hope we become wiser and enrich our personal , intimate and professional lives and points of view.



“A person without self-control is like a city with broken down walls.”



~DELL~